Girls Day Out: The Importance of Pieces

Girls Day Out at first seemed almost superficial to me.  Here was a poem, a rather long one, I read it, and it was good but nothing too special.  About some girls and some horses.  And I saw it flash a few words, and I read them all but I just didn’t ‘get it.’

Then I read the second poem, which hard a much darker feeling to it and the words from the first one really clicked.  Finally, everything was explained in the author’s note.

The words separated from the poem depict a story you wouldn’t know from just looking at it, yet are made and contained in the “big picture.”  The big poem was a more carefree depiction of girls and their horses.  The words pulled out contained the words relating to the mysterious murders that happened at that very location.

When I read the author’s note, I was haunted.  It starts with the story very much like the poem, and then it reveals that murders were at the same exact location.  The concept that it could have been the author herself who was one of those bodies was a realization the author had obviously realized herself.  The pieces pulled from the first poem were to share that dark secret with you the way the author learned–after you had already accepted the peace and the beauty.

The second piece ‘Shards’ was much darker.  It was composed of, well, shards of newspaper article(s).  It had a much darker theme–stark contrast to the original first poem.  The animation this time told more story, not so much uncovered parts.  But each time certain pieces were left from the last and adding a different angle to the story.  It again showed how each piece could be the same yet changed.   The poem was  very jagged, often times almost confusing–sort of like the pieces of this mysterious case.

Overall, I appreciate the author’s use of flash animation to make a visual note that “these words are different now.”  The way the words were presented told the stories in their own way.  It was a wonderful manipulation of semantics and wordplay to tell a very deep story so simply and beautifully.

– Aly Ferguson


~ by notsinthetix on January 24, 2011.

One Response to “Girls Day Out: The Importance of Pieces”

  1. Overall, I think there wasn’t a great deal of fluff in here. It was pretty streamlined. There isn’t too much description for the sake of description and summarizing for the sake of summarizing. (There was still some though, certainly.) There isn’t much “I like this” and all that.

    With the lack of fluff, there’s also a lack of relevant description, that certainly needs to be fixed in a revision. I need to go deeper.

    The third paragraph is mostly the stuff I said I avoided overall. Some ideas with it would be great support with the description.

    Overall, most of the improvement could go deeper and bring more emphasis to the theme I was presenting.

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